Dear OrdinaryGirl

dearordinarygirl

Dear OrdinaryGirl,

I was out shopping today and thought of you. The woman at the checkout packed away my shopping and, as I watched, I thought that you would be screaming silently had you been there. I bought icecream; want to share? I’ll come to you, you’re not so far away.

While I’m here, I was wondering if you had time for an opinion. My little girl asked me who I loved most in the world. I told her, “You, of course, and the little man.” She replied that she knew that, but she meant in the other kind of way. She wanted to know who I was most ‘in love’ with.

Do I tell her honestly that I fell head over heels with another woman long ago? Would she understand that at the tender age of 6? Or should I lie? How honest should you be with your children?

Yours Truly xxx

 

Dear Yours Truly,

With my OCD on the rampage, I would have probably walked out of the shop. I’d love to share your ice cream, but I’m lactose intolerant… would be a bad plan. Maybe in the holidays when I don’t have to be at work!

I always said I would be honest with my children, but I only told my daughter recently that I date women. She doesn’t care, but then she is a little older. I think it depends what you’re comfortable with… Maybe my blogging friends will have a different opinion. I’ll sleep on it.

OrdinaryGirl x x

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6 thoughts on “Dear OrdinaryGirl

  1. humph – this is a good question – and i am not certain how to answer it in the fact everyone is different – meaning I have boys, not girls. they are older. now i can look at this in two ways – should i tell my boys i have fallen in love with another person – i did that – and he is the one who is killing me inside and they see this. i think right now they feel the only people i should love is them. Now, if i told them i was seeing another woman, well, this would be an interesting thing. If i was to ever involve myself with another person of the same gender, i would not hold it back. but like i said, they are older. if they were younger, i am not certain basically because their father is a total intolerant homophobe ass – or shall i say intolerant of any alternative lifestyle. Now, i would tell them, but i would hold off because their father would not think twice of using this to hurt me – them….. I guess what i am trying to say is that it depends on the child, their maturity…… oy – i am rambling:). sorry.

  2. I have four girls, 4, 6, 8, 15, and we adopted a total honesty policy with our first. The general consensus in my sphere and from professionals is that, if they can ask it, they deserve the truth even if they don’t understand it fully. It has served us well so far, but it can be scary. That is my experience. My opinion is that it is vital for us as parents to break any stigma that is either false or irrational. Sexuality is not a moral issue, it is nature.

    • I’m with you completely on breaking stigma. My only question here is… If you tell a child something that they don’t understand, and they repeat it to others (I’m never going to be one to ask a child to keep something quiet) are you potentially subjecting them to other peoples’ prejudices unnecessarily?

      • Possibly, but if we shield our kids from the fact that others are prejudiced, we might deny them the chance to understand the world around them. Again, this is a delicate matter and each parent should act on their convictions as they pertain to their children. I only spoke up because I have faced this sort of thing a few times. We live in the “bible belt” in a very conservative part of the country, but we are not a religious family. My kids are asked -too often- where they go to church, and when they answer, they are questioned beyond their understanding. Adults do this. It makes me want to swing my sword, but they always figure out that there is nothing wrong with being outside the norm. I hope that helps.

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